Smart Moms Find Time Together Valuable

In the beginning, the idea was simply to have dinner together. Carole Eagle and her three girlfriends had been students at Rutgers University in New Brunswick, NJ, where they’d all had part-time jobs as waitresses at a nearby tavern. When they got married, they attended one another’s weddings. And they all still lived in New Jersey. So it seemed like a happy idea to meet at a centrally located restaurant every couple of months and keep up with the changes in their increasingly busy lives.

But minor complications arose. “We wanted to have some wine with dinner, and that meant we couldn’t drive. So we had to stretch it to overnight,” Eagle recalls, a bit mischievously. “Our husbands agreed.”

The four began holding their reunions in suite-style hotels, so they’d have a living room to lounge in. “We’d have dinner, get into our PJs, and eat junk food,” Eagle says. “We just talked and laughed and told remember-when stories. It was a slumber party!”

Getting together for tea!

Getting together for tea!

When Eagle and her husband and two sons moved to Raleigh, NC, in 1994, no one wanted to give up these cherished overnights. So the Jerseyans drove south, Eagle flew north, and they met at a hotel near Washington, DC. By now, the getaway had expanded to several nights, the better to fit in a museum or two, a little shopping, a nice long lunch.

In the years since, the four friends have managed to gather at least once or twice a year under similar circumstances. “It’s a complete goof-off,” says Eagle, 39, who runs a small embroidery business with her husband. The Eagles take family vacations, too, and once in a great while, Carole and her husband, Robert, even manage a weekend alone. But the time she spends with Anne Marie, Jean, and Lori is different: “You have no responsibilities. That’s the biggest thing, the freedom. The major decision is where to eat dinner each night.”

IN LIVES FILLED TO OVERFLOWING WITH the demands of children, jobs, husbands, and homes, many of us feel like we don’t even have time for the neighborly kaffeeklatsches our mothers enjoyed, much less a weekend getaway. But making time for pals–real time–isn’t just an indulgence. Experts say that intimate friendships can help women increase their sense of self-worth. “Having a friend who understands, and for whom you can reciprocate that understanding, can enhance growth and well-being,” says Nancy Genero, associate professor of psychology at Wellesley College in Massachusetts. More men are involved with child care these days, as well–which means dad can often be enlisted to mind the home front while mom’s away. That change has helped to make women-only vacations possible. “It was not done in a previous generation, at least not in my family,” says Bette Bohlinger, 63, who with her husband ran a family-owned dress shop in Billings, MT, while raising six children. “But I think women have a better feeling about themselves now. We deserve this treat too.” A couple of years ago, she and her three working-mom daughters spent two heavenly days at the Chico Hot Springs resort in southwestern Montana. They celebrated her eldest’s new master’s degree, hiked the foothills, did a bit of window-shopping in nearby Livingston, and talked into the night. Meanwhile, the daughters’ seven kids, ages 10 through 19, were at home with their dads. “It’s not a tradition,” Bohlinger says, “but maybe it will become one.”

JUST AS MEN HAVE ALWAYS MADE TIME FOR hunting or fishing excursions with their pals, women are discovering the pleasures of getting away with their friends. Often, the attraction is the freedom of being, even briefly, off the clock. As any mom who’s gone on vacation with her family can attest, women don’t leave their responsibilities behind when the location changes. Who packs? Who remembers to stop the newspaper delivery? Who arranges care for the family beagle? And who reminds everybody to use sunscreen?

When Debbie Whicker, 36, a preschool teacher in Fayetteviile, AR, takes family vacations with her husband and three boys (ages 12, 10, and 6), a fine time is had by all–but sometimes Whicker still feels she’s on the job. “You tend to stay within the same parameters you occupy at home–you’re cooking meals, taking care,” she says. “You have attachments, and they’re good attachments, but you’re not free.”

The vacations she’s had with her sisters and friends feel different. Take the week she spent with her youngest sister, Robin, a research biologist stationed in the U.S. Virgin Islands. The sisters walked along an uninhabited beach for 12 hours at a stretch, carrying food and water in backpacks; they checked sea-turtle nesting sites and counted eggs. “What made it special was being able to share part of my sister’s life, unencumbered by my wonderful kids and my wonderful husband,” says Whicker, whose understanding mother-in-law had volunteered to help keep things running at home while she was away.

IN OTHER CASES, THE TRIP ARISES FROM AN interest–or a fantasy–that friends share, but spouses don’t. A committed hiker and canoeist in Portland, OR, Gwen Dickson, 37, was at a party when a group of women she knew–including her best chum and maid of honor, Sharon–started talking about a trek through the Himalayas. Impulsively, Dickson piped up that she’d like to go.

“I’d always wanted to see the Himalayas–to go someplace extremely foreign to me,” she says. But her husband is “not an outdoor person.” Besides, as a self-employed legal stenographer, Dickson had the flexibility to spend four weeks in Nepal; her husband, a food exporter, couldn’t take that kind of time off from his business. “I thought, `If I’m ever going to go, I want to do it with this group.'”

sing-gompaThe five women hiked together weekly through the summer to build stamina, and met in one another’s homes to discuss equipment and hear previous trekkers share their experiences. In October 1997, they flew to Katmandu, met their guides and porters, and set off. Their 17-day trek began through evergreen forests, ascended into mountain meadows, then continued past the tree line along rocky paths. They hiked five to eight hours a day, spent cold nights in tents and sleeping bags, and celebrated their senior member’s fiftieth birthday with balloons and a spice cake at 11,500 feet. At a small village called Sing Gompa, they watched a full moon rise over the snowy peaks. “You just stare,” says Dickson. “It was gorgeous.”

Dickson returned home just before Thanksgiving and now remembers her trek as “an accomplishment. I feel wonderful for having done it.” And the opportunity to be with women friends “was a great feeling…. We were able to talk about just everything.”

OTHER WOMEN THRIVE ON LESS STRENUOUS vacations with friends and kids, an arrangement that provides adult companionship and help with child-care chores. Lisa Verhovek spends several weeks each summer at a Cape Cod cottage owned by her father-in-law. Her husband, a newspaper reporter, usually joins the family for about half the time. It’s an idyllic setting, but without the normal complement of nursery schools, baby-sitters, and play dates, she finds that keeping her kids entertained can be exhausting.

Seven summers ago, Verhovek invited two girlfriends to bring their children and join her for five days. They spent long afternoons at the beach, where the four kids played in tidal pools and built sand castles. The women pitched in with cooking and storyreading–and still had time left to enjoy one another’s company once the children were in bed. “We were all at home moms then, and had spent a lot of time together on play dates,” recalls Verhovek. “But being away from the routine–paying bills, answering phones–really let our friendship grow to new levels.” She’s taken similar husband-free excursions since–as well as a few minus spouse and kids.

BEYOND FUN AND FRIENDSHIP, AN ALL-women getaway can sometimes provide real comfort.

“When women spend time together, they nurture each other,” says Genero.

That was the case for the Bohlinger women when they gathered at Chico Hot Springs: Their applause for daughter Jeanne Cox’s new master’s degree was mixed with empathetic back pats. Cox, 44, had also just finalized a divorce after 18 years of marriage and moved to a new home with her three sons. “It “was a hard year, a lot of stress,” she acknowledges. “I’d been so busy trying to take care of my kids and my job. It was relaxing to spend time with people who accept you no matter what.”

Often the setting doesn’t matter much. Whicker remembers a visit with her older sister, Carrie, who lived near San Francisco. The two drove an hour to a Marin County hotel they’d seen advertised in a newspaper, hoping for “some quiet time to be together and discuss things.” The place turned out to be “kind of seedy.” The pool was dry. But so what? “It added to the adventure,” Whicker says. Undaunted, they window-shopped, bought themselves a nice meal, and talked about their childhoods, their daily lives, their futures. “It was lovely,” she recalls.

Even a short getaway can yield benefits. A couple of years ago, Whicker and five friends hit the road to Tulsa, for a mini-vacation that included a two-hour drive punctuated by singing along with the radio, an afternoon of scouring discount and consignment stores, a high-spirited dinner at a Japanese restaurant, and a night in a shared hotel room. There was a round of card games before everyone turned in; the next day they drove back to Fayetteville.

That’s where the bonus came in. “That trip really endeared us to our spouses,” Whicker says. Her husband was weary from ferrying three boys to the park, playing endless games, and otherwise filling in; the other husbands were similarly worn down by the rigors of filling their wives’ shoes. “By the time we got back,” Whicker says, “we were much appreciated.” Which is one reason they’re planning to do it again, soon.

How To Deal With Panic Attacks Quickly And Efficiently

htdwpIf it seems that you will suffer from panic attack and you start to feel bad, there are some techniques that can help you to relax and prevent the panic attack to arrive. These techniques include deep breathing and relaxation of body and mind. They can be performed daily and when the next panic attack arrives, you will be prepared and maybe even able to stop it. But how to deal with panic attacks when they are here?

First, focus on slow breathing. Put your hand on your stomach, and the other on your chest. Try to breathe slow and deep. Take the air through your nose and while you’re doing that, count to five. While breathing in, your chest should not move, but be still. On the other side, your stomach should be moving. You will fill how your muscles work in your stomach area and if the belly is growing while you breathe in, that’s the proper breathing. Focusing on breathing will keep your mind relaxed and after you exercise breathing a bit, your body will soon be relaxed as well. If you breathe in by moving your chest, that will be short and low breathing and you will not be able to allow air to fill the longs completely as when your breathe by moving the diaphragm. See other ways to avoid these attacks here.

Natural Methods Of Preventing Panic Attacks

Changing the environment when you feel like you are going to drive crazy is good solution if you suffer from panic disorder. Experts claim that this type of change is of great importance for those who want to stop panic attacks. When you feel some of the symptoms occurring (hyperventilating, shaking, dizziness and similar), try to pay your attention to someone pleasant like singing a song or playing an instrument. Music often helps, so turn the radio on or just sing by yourself. You can watch the TV or read jokes on the internet. You surely have some friends and family, so pick up the phone and call your mother or spouse when you feel bad.

Any change you will make in your surrounding may help you to stop the panic attack. Just do not sit and do nothing because that will lead you to think about your problem even more. Do all you can to pay your attention to positive things. Friendly conversation can stop your panic and calm you down. Also, drink a glass of water or fresh juice. Eat a chocolate bar or take an apple. If you are sitting in your house when the symptoms are occurring, go out and take a walk.

Centre For Drug Addiction Treatment

cfdatExcessive drinking is extremely risky for the health of individuals. For the comfort and restoration of those obsessed individuals, the drug rehab centers are playing amazing role. The addicted patient needs several educative as well as collective learning to deal with their anxiety and stress that is the result of serious habit. For this intention, drug restoration applications also designed several lifestyle expertise training programs to create effective interaction as well as socializing among sufferers. These helpful activities increase up the spirits of addicts as well as they can get over their worries, stresses and shame emotions.

The major disadvantage of alcohol habit is it entirely affects the person psychologically and actually & the mainly harmful and risky effect is resting on the spirituality. The enthusiast completely drops its inner serenity and family life battle a lot. Selecting the correct drug rehab centers may be difficult as well as complicated but it is important as well as may be an explanation into whether a rehabilitation program is succeeding or not. You can narrow the search for the purpose of getting the accurate details about the restoration facilities in your country.  Even in this case, you require consulting for further details about the restoration applications and the charge of restoration at those facilities.

Signs And Symptoms Of A Person Who Should Visit A Drug Rehab

It is very important for you as an individual to be careful on your friends and family behaviors. If you are a parent, it is important for you to keep a close eye especially on your teenage girls and boys. According to statistics, many people are lured into drug addiction during their teenage years. This is an age whereby people tend to try to discover them. It is a very critical age in the life of a person. When a person becomes a drug or substance addict, there are several signs and symptoms they exhibit.

For instance, a person who suddenly starts isolating him or herself could be a drug addict. In most cases, drug addicts lose a connection between themselves and their family and friends. They do not accept the fact that they are addicts and tend to hide from the public. Another obvious sign is a financial drain. A person who cannot account for their expenses clearly or tends to hide some information on where they spend their money could as well be spending it on drugs. Finally, drug addicts suffer from family breakups, and emotional instability. They can no longer hold relationships dear to their lives for this is substituted with the drugs and alcohol. Such people must be given an admission to the drug rehab centers.

Investing In Your Blog Writing Business

iybmbBlog writing can be a form of freelance job since you can really earn from it. There are various ways how you can earn by blogging but let us discuss how you can invest in earning from a self-hosted blog site. Setting up a blog and choosing the start can be tricky. There are both free and paid domains that require HTML codes to run and some have templates of layouts where you can pick and mix your own design to make yours look original. Investing on a blog site is never expensive even in the beginning since once you have an informative blog site and you earn spectators, then you can expect a sure profit.

There are many ways how you can earn money by blogging. A tip to earn from blogging is make sure your site follows the current trend and all types of audience and spectators will love what you are writing. Before setting up a blog, you need to decide first what field you will be writing about. Your target audiences are those who are frequently using the internet and who love to read blogs instead of turning the television on to watch the current news. There are many ways to earn, as well.

Here Is The Basic Buttons You Will Need When Starting A Blog!

Aside from putting “About Us” in your bottom page, you also need to put more buttons for different categories depending on what your blog site is all about. It could maybe be about technology. If you are blogging about technology, the latest news about newly developed items that use technology beyond its limitations would be nice. That could be one of your tabs or maybe add more tabs about innovations in process, things you would want to buy etc. Before starting a blog, you need to list down already the things you want to be included in your blog site.

There are also things you need to include when planning what your blog should look like. It is really important to have your final layout before starting a blog and going to the live system on the internet. Also, when you ask for the viewers to input their email addresses for subscribing to your letter mail, then you have to put a link that discusses their privacy terms. The privacy terms should have something like promising them that their email addresses will only be asked so you can send email to them and will not be given to other websites; especially marketers.

When You Create A Blog, Here Are The Things You Need To Beware Of

Do not be too eager to post your article as blog. After you create a blog, here are some of the things you need to be aware of so you will know how to face the consequences just in case you encounter any of these. Before we move forward, these are about your articles that might be stolen or you can be accused of stealing.

First, the most common thing people who create a blog face are having their articles stolen and most of the time rephrased so the wordings will be different but the concept is the same. People who are too lazy to create a blog often do this and this is actually a form of stealing.

The next one is copying or mimicking an article you have seen in the internet and you copied it but because you want to make it look original, you rephrased it and changed some words. Quite a tactic but if there are more words that are the same with the source article, then it will most likely be obvious. There is actually a tool that prevents these kinds of plagiarism. There is a tool called Copyscape and it searches the whole inventory of articles in the internet to look for the source article where your article has been copied to.

Wrinkle Creams Recommended by Dermatologists

My sister wants to know which is the best wrinkle cream she should try. She knows that I once had wrinkles and I managed to get rid of it by applying wrinkle cream on my face. Of course I want her to do away with the fine lines on her face but I worry that the product I used will not work for her. We have different skin types even if we are siblings.

wrinkles-helpI remember when I recommended the same product to a good friend of mine. I was thinking that suggesting a product to her could help her. But it did not turn out well. She experienced negative side effects from using the product like itching and redness. She ended up having blemishes and her wrinkles remained. With this in mind, I’d like to remind my sister that she should do thorough research regarding the product before she starts using it. One of the better informational sites for these creams is here. She must consult with her dermatologist, as well, to know about her skin type and which ingredients she must look for. I will remind her that she should not get easily convinced to just try on products that her friends suggested her. I know the risks and I do not wish any of it to happen to my sister.

Anti Wrinkle Creams That Can Deliver On Their Claims

Seriously, I feel that my wife needs to find a solid wrinkle cream. The fine lines on her face are becoming obvious. In fact, when one of my colleagues saw us together, she thought of her as my older sister. I did not mention it to my wife but I am very sure that when she learned about it, she’ll definitely get mad. She used to be an attractive woman. In fact, many guys were courting her when I met her. Probably because of too much stress, wrinkles have developed on her face. Even the skin on her neck is starting to sag. I really think that she can get rid of this unsightly sign of aging with an effective anti wrinkle cream. I am willing to help her out in finding which brand truly deserves her attempt.

I know that the market has a lot to offer for wrinkle sufferers but I do not want my wife to settle on a product that is not safe for consumption and one that will only give her false hope. I just love her so much and I want her to always feel good about herself. I am certain that in way, she is having a hard time coping up with these undesirable changes on her complexion.

Copyright © Think
Getting your brain going, 24/7.

Built on